Crush Confessions

Naan 34M. Ellarum naan strong nu nenachikraanga, aana daily night la naan thaniya azharen. Naan ellarkittayum nalla irukken nu solren, aana nijama naan nalla illa. Pudhu city ku vandha apram life improve aagum nu nenachen, aana same fears dhan vandhuduchu. En parents en mela romba trust vachirukkaanga. Unmai therinja ellam odanjidum. En dream job kidaichiduchu, aana manasu innum empty ah irukku. Idhu dhaan first time naan ippadi open ah sollren.

Meri life bahar se sorted lagti hai, par andar bahut noise chal raha hai. Itne logon ke beech rehkar bhi main akeli feel karti hoon. Sab bolte hain main mature hoon, par sach mein main sirf thak gayi hoon. Jo relationship chahiye tha woh mil gaya, par sukoon fir bhi nahi mila. Bas dil halka karna tha.

I smile through everything because I do not know how to explain how heavy life feels lately. I moved to a new city to start over, but my old fears came with me. I got the job I prayed for, but somehow I feel emptier than before. I am 33M, everyone thinks I am strong, but I cry every night after acting normal all day. I am surrounded by people every day and still feel painfully alone. My parents trust me so much. If they knew the truth about my life right now, everything would break. I finally have the relationship I wanted, but my heart still feels restless and scared. I have never said this out loud before.

Purathu kaanumbo life nannayi thonnam, ullil valiya struggle undu. Ente parents enne valare trust cheyyunnu. Sathiyam arinjhal ellam pizhachupokum. Enikku dream job kitti, pakshe manassu innum valare shunyam aanu. Njan 19F. Ellavarum njan strong aanu ennu vicharikkunnu, pakshe njan rathriyil thanichu karayunnu. Ithokke njan aadyamayittu aanu ithra open ayi parayunnathu.

Naanu 21F. Yellarigu naanu strong anisutte, aadre prati ratri nanu mounavagi althini. Yellaroo nanu mature antare, aadre nanu kevala sustaagiddini. Nanna parents nan mele tumba trust ide. Nijana gothadre ellavu muriyutte. Janara madhye iddaru kooda nanu tumba lonely anisutte. Ellarige nanu sari iddini anta helthini, aadre nijavagi sari illa. Nange beku anta relationship bandide, aadre calm siglilla. Nanage dream job sikthu, aadru manasu innoo empty anisutte. Idu tumba dina inda olage ittu.

Sobai ke boli ami thik achi, kintu asole ami ekdom thik nei. Baire theke amar life sorted mone hoy, kintu bhitore onek jhamela cholche. Ami 31F. Sobai bhabe ami khub strong, kintu prottek raat e chupchap kandi. Amar dream job peyechi, tao mone hoy bhitor ta puro khali. Onekdin dhore eta buker moddhe chhilo.

Neraya per irundhaalum naan romba lonely ah feel panren. En parents en mela romba trust vachirukkaanga. Unmai therinja ellam odanjidum. Velila paatha en life perfect madhiri theriyum, aana ullae romba chaos irukku. Pudhu city ku vandha apram life improve aagum nu nenachen, aana same fears dhan vandhuduchu. En dream job kidaichiduchu, aana manasu innum empty ah irukku. Ellarum naan mature nu solraanga, aana naan just romba tired. Konjam manasu light aaganum nu dhaan post panren.

Sobai ke boli ami thik achi, kintu asole ami ekdom thik nei. Ami 22F. Sobai bhabe ami khub strong, kintu prottek raat e chupchap kandi. Baire theke amar life sorted mone hoy, kintu bhitore onek jhamela cholche. Onno der moddhe thakleo khub eka lage. Amar dream job peyechi, tao mone hoy bhitor ta puro khali. Ja relationship chai chilam seta peyechi, tao mone shanti nei. Ektu mon halka kortei ekhane likhlam.

Itne logon ke beech rehkar bhi main akeli feel karti hoon. Nayi jagah aake socha tha sab theek ho jayega, par darr saath hi aa gaya. Mujhe dream job mil gayi, phir bhi dil bilkul khali lag raha hai. Sab bolte hain main mature hoon, par sach mein main sirf thak gayi hoon. Mere parents mujh par itna trust karte hain. Agar unhe sach pata chale toh sab toot jayega. Samajh nahi aa raha kyun post kar rahi hoon, par karna zaroori laga.

Hu 25F chhu. Badhane lage chhe ke hu strong chhu, pan hu roj ratre chupchaap rdu chhu. Mara parents mane khub trust kare chhe. Ene sach khabar pade toh badhu tootse. Ghana loko vachche hoy pan pan eklaapan bahu lage chhe. Bahar thi life sorted dekhay chhe, pan andar ghano pressure chhe. Hu badhane kahu chhu ke hu fine chhu, pan sach ma hu fine nathi. Mane mari dream job mali gayi, pan andar thi khali khali lage chhe. Bas thodu man halka karvu hatu.